Showing posts with label Sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sex. Show all posts

Wednesday, 4 April 2012

An Exposition of Love- Part I

That all people are drawn to God is evident in the saying: God is Love. In one way or another, at some time or another, each one of us evidences that they love Love itself. We are the product of Love itself, by our love of things, namely beauty. We are in love with beauty, and at the same time we are attracted to love because of its own beauty. It’s almost become a cliché to say that Love is an action. But love really is a work, the highest expression of human dignity and to negate it is to extinguish a very real part of our humanity in who we are essentially.

            One of the greatest temptations in modern society is the temptation to negate work while obtaining its ends. It’s a paradoxical problem, for love in particular, because while it is yet so concomitant to the formal and essential existence of mankind and the individual person we’ve deceived ourselves into thinking that the act of love can be left aside while getting at things such as sexuality which in truth is a beautiful expression of love. In reality, love, while being a labor in itself to various goods and ends, is not merely sought for these ends but for the sake of itself. And here is the proof of it: What is family without love? What is friendship with out love? What is sex without love? What is work without love? What is patriotism, or religion, or anything besides without love? We all know the very simple answer, which is that it is all vain drudgery. There is no enlightening that takes place in any of these apart from love. They become purposeless and base, essentially aimless, when existing only for the sake of themselves. Love alone is that which in existing for itself, exists for all things.

            We cannot have things like family, friendship, sex, or vocation, as we really desire them, apart from love. Love itself is essential to the fabric of what we desire as human creatures. Therefore, apart from love, we cannot hope to obtain those things which make us human. It’s really quite profound that we cannot realize our humanity without the presence of love in society and in our own individuality. That’s why we call that which lacks love, inhumane, in the schema of human relations. Just as profound, while realizing our own humanity in love, our individualism and our communal identity bleed into one in the context of love. We are willing to do more than guard the integrity of our individual identity, sacrificing ourselves for that which would sacrifice itself for us, even aside from the knowledge that it is the case. In other words, we are loving before it is requited, when loving purely. This is where the greatest magnanimity of the human spirit is seen: unconditional and selfless love.

            Much of man’s pain arises from the fact that he is awash with internal and communal paradoxes. It’s often said that people do the most horrible and senseless acts because they are afraid. That can be a difficult concept to grasp, and at first may not ring completely true. However, upon examination, we can unravel a perhaps a more articulate exposition of this truth, which is that man is in a state of seemingly hopeless despair. His despair comes from his inability to reconcile these paradoxes with each other and with what he knows and believes to be right and true. His despair comes from his quest to find himself, as he really is and to provide for that real man in accordance with his real needs. As stated early, man cannot realize himself as he truly is apart from love as it truly is.

            Imagine the great psychosis we are all under to some degree. How often does time reveal our needs to only have been wants? How many things have we and do we view as essential that later prove only to be ancillary? In the course of life, how often do we cast ourselves upon fashion hoping to find ourselves therein, only to realize as we get older how shallow of a substitute those fashions were to something more real? This species of bewilderment and beguilement which man labors under also stems to greater things, such as ideology, politics, and economical systems. In a great irony, we begin to see clearly how hardly man sees at all. We are suddenly inclined to say with Socrates,” I am only [truly] aware of the fact of my own ignorance.”

            There is one paradox in which man can hope to be lost in addition to the knowledge of his own ignorance, however, and that is his ability to while receiving divine love and attempting to share it in its fullness as he receives it, to give something genuinely to activate that participation; that ‘something’ is his very self. Participation with this divine love must be more than active, just as it must be more than an emotion. It must be active as an extension of something real within him. That is to say, love acted out in the form of charity and compassion, must be love from man’s inner intention finding extension in the world.

            Herein, we see that practiced love is only half the matter. No amount of self giving or communal giving for the temporal and psychological needs of our neighbor could ever replace the true intention of the inner man. This is where love becomes hard. Man co-suffers with his neighbor when he truly loves, and he obtains this schematic from God who is Love. For this reason, it could not have been any other way, except that God override his justice with his mercy, to fulfill love, to co-suffer with his beloved, mankind. So, just as he as Love itself was called to co-suffering with his beloved, we are required by love to co-suffer. This engages our whole being, which is why Christ commands us,” You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. And you shall love your neighbor as yourself.” Naturally, we put at the disposal of our own pursuit of happiness all of our faculties. If we are to belong to God, we admit that we belong to love, and in belonging to love it is incumbent upon us to obey this command of co-suffering.

            It is an arduous path to choose to love, over and over, because in light of our concern for self, which is ever present, it does not appear to us initially as the choice to love. On the contrary! This choice appears to us as the choice to suffer, and in such a fashion that it is to someone else’ good, or perhaps more pertinently that we do not suffer to our good. Similarly, we see ourselves suffering if we are selfish. This, however, is at least to what our own psychosis esteems as our pleasure and our good. Therefore, essentially the decision to act becomes the decision to suffer for someone else’ good or our own.

            Much of mans inner dialogue centers around this very choice of preferment. In reality the choice is to suffer for the real good of others or the imagined good of ourselves. The only real good we can hope to achieve for ourselves comes from suffering for others. It’s a great mystery, but a very present and clear one. It’s a part of the paradox man may rightly hope to lose himself in. The conversation between mans passions and his conscience is evidence of his great nobility and dignity, and wherever his conscience is rightly informed and wins out he is noble and dignified. However, wherever his conscience surrenders to his passions he experiences degradation, while inflicting degradation upon his community as well, because at least in himself he is a part thereof.

            In many ways, modern society has compounded mans proclivity to find the easiest route to pleasure and success. His genius, intellect and cleverness are part of his identity, and when in conjunction with his conscience and selfless love, do manifest the most noble of paradigms. But when out of the context of morality and conscience his genius loses its inherent nobility. It is important to note that the nobility of mans genius is inherent to its goodness, and that the divine meaning of his genius is more important than the genius itself. We see that love is the source of life, and not only, but good and abundant life. The nobility of genius, which it gets in the context of conscience and morality, subordinates it to love. Apart from love, the ends of genius become the bait of proverbial rat traps.

            Without love, genius is dehumanized. If we look back to a time when the field of psychology had no substantive ethics, we see human genius misguided. In the attempt to understand himself and to gain knowledge that would be advantageous for mankind, we see psychologists engaging with some frequency and notoriety in positively atrocious experiments which degraded human beings into mere objects of experimentation. We see these victims of inhumane genius offered up, as it were, to so-called progress. We see the same sort of depraved medical experimentation, even more dramatically and horrifically, carried out by Nazi doctors in concentrations camps. In the attempt to obtain scientific and medical progress, these intellectuals who represent the apex of society made shipwreck of conscience in the name of society’s welfare.

            We do the same thing as individuals when we choose to degrade other human being for our own pleasure, profit, and welfare. For instance, abortion, pornography, child labor, and unjust wages to name a few prime examples. The love which we owe our fellow man, the love which is incumbent upon us to give to our neighbor, our family, is negated in these. Humans are very adept at identifying goods, and I use that term not only in a tangible sense, but also psychosocially and metaphysically. These goods drive us, as an incentive to participate in the excellence of love. One of the most exemplary models of love, sex itself, is one such good. In the modern time, when man has been lead to believe that through various means he may obtain the ends of work, the goods, without work he is particularly susceptible in his sexuality. He is prone to believe that apart from the work of love, sex can be his. It’s the cheese on the rat trap, a trap that can only contribute to the destruction of who he really is, because who he really is can only be realized through the work of love.

            Hitherto, we seem reaffirmed in the notion that the arduous path of love in which man realizes his true self is a choice. Not only, but that it is the highest expression of his dignity and that all things pertaining to him are concomitant to it. The only way to love, then, is in the context of this notion that all things are subordinate to love, making all life subordinate to love. How sad then that love has been turned into a game, that people, the young especially, are encouraged to treat it like a game. Even worse that they are given license by modern society to love with gravity as many as they see fit, capitulating the most sacred part of themselves in dating. Herein, whether or not sex is present, a confusion and obfuscation of love, of an immense order, is fomented. All this under the pretense that some how they will learn how to love, or the true meaning of love, through exercising their sexuality in perennial relationships with members of the sex to which they are attracted.      


Every art and every inquiry, and similarly every action and choice, is thought to aim at some good; and for this reason the good has rightly been declared to be that at which all things aim. ~Aristotle~

Friday, 4 March 2011

'The True Adornment of Woman' -St. John Chrysostom-

Here is a timeless homily of St. John Chrysostom's (circa 390 A.D.) to consider in contrast with the highly sexual modern fashions of today:

"Do you wish to adorn your face? Do not do so with gems but with piety and modesty; thus adorned, a man will find your appearance more pleasing to behold. For that other kind of adornment generally arouses suspicions which give rise to jealousy, enmity, strife, and quarrels. For there is nothing more disgusting than a suspiciously beautiful face.

But the adornment which comes from almsgiving and modesty drives out all wicked suspicion and draws your husband to you with greater strength than any chain. For natural beauty does not make a face become beautiful as much as does the disposition of him who beholds it, and nothing is more likely to produce this disposition than modesty and piety. Hence even if a woman be beautiful but her husband hates her, she will appear to him as the ugliest of women; if a woman does not happen to be comely but she pleases her husband, he will find her the fairest of women. Judgments are made not in the light of the nature of what is seen but in the light of the disposition of those who see it.

Adorn your face, therefore, with modesty, piety, almsgiving, benevolence, love, kindliness towards your husband, reasonableness, mildness, and forbearance. These are the pigments of virtue; by there you draw not men but angels as your lovers; for these you have God Himself to praise you. When God shall approve of you, He will win over your husband to you in every way; for if wisdom illumines the face of a man, much more does virtue make the face of a woman shine forth.

If you consider that virtue is a great adornment to your beauty, tell me, what benefit will come to you from pearls on that day? But what need is there to speak of that day, when it is possible to prove all these to speak of that day, when it is possible to prove all thee points with arguments from the present life? Surely, when those who are held to have insulted the emperor are dragged into court and are in danger of their lives, then their mothers and wives put off their necklaces, their gold and pearls, all their adornment and gold-embroidered robes; they put on a simple, inexpensive garment, sprinkle themselves with ashes, roll in the dust before the doors of the courtroom, and in this way try to move their judges.

But if golden ornaments, pearls, and embroidered robes could treacherously betray you in the courts of this world, whereas mildness, gentleness, ashes, tears, cheap garments are more calculated to win the judge over to your side, this would be all the more true in that dread judgment where there can be no bribing. For what word of defense will you be able to speak when the Master shall accuse you in the matter of these pearls, and when He shall lead forward the poor who have perished from hunger? This is why Paul said: not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothing. For these could be a trap.

But even if we should enjoy these things day in and day out, we shall be separated from them utterly by death. Virtue, however, does not change or alter; it is completely secure, and it both makes us more secure in this world and goes along with us to the next. Do you wish to possess pearls and never lay aside this wealth? Then strip off your adornment and put it into Christ's hands through the hands of His poor. He will guard all your riches for you against the day when He will raise up your body with great glory. Then He will put on you a better wealth and richer adornment, since your present wealth and adornment are really paltry and ridiculous.

Think, then, who they are whom you wish to please and on whose account you wear this adornment . Is it that the ropemaker and the coppersmith and the man in the market may look at you and marvel (lust)? Are you not ashamed and do you not blush to be showing yourself off to these people and to be doing all this for men whom you do not consider worthy of greeting?"

"Every art and every inquiry, and similarly every action and choice, is thought to aim at some good; and for this reason the good has rightly been declared to be that at which all things aim." ~Aristotle~

Monday, 27 December 2010

Africa & Condoms

 I'd like to make a practical and fiduciary argument for why contraception is bad for Africa.

Anyone who has ever seen the back of a condom has read the following storage warnings or something similar: Store below 40°C (104°F). No long-term exposure to high humidity, direct sunlight, fluorescent light, or ozone. Don’t store near chemicals. Do not store in wallet or other places of high friction. Do not store in an excessively dry environment.

And of course we have the shelf life if all those conditions are met:" 4 years (for USAID-donated; may vary according to national policy)." (http://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/global/Contraceptives.htm accessed Dec 27. 2010)

Now, think about this. What are the odds of the storage conditions being met in Africa? Lot's of people clap their hands and laud the practice of pushing prophylactics on Africans as though they were doing them a favor. But if I could give them one of those condoms I wonder if they would use it. It couldn't be that bad, now could it?

The condoms aren't the real sturdy kind like you'd get in Europe and America, they're cheaper. They get put into steel sea containers for who knows how long, waiting to be put on a freight liner. Maybe, the condoms ship across the briny sea immediately. But then again maybe they wait for a month or two, or more. Then they finally get to Africa. The steel sea container is placed on a truck and driven out to an aid station, maybe in a desert, maybe in a jungle. Either way the storage conditions are exceeded. If they're in the desert do you think that it just might get a tad bit hotter than 104°F inside the steel sea container as it sits in the blistering hot African sun? And don't you suppose that the hot sun and arid desert might ruin more than a few of the condoms? Well, we have to assume that, don't we? After all, the makers and distributors of the condoms say so themselves, on every condom!

And if they end up in the jungle it's the same story; sweltering heat far exceeding 104°F and unacceptable conditions of long term humidity. How many weeks or months will it take, do you imagine to distribute that many prophylactics? How many months in these totally unacceptable conditions will these condoms sit before they get used?

But aside from all this we have the shelf life warning: "Four years (for USAID-donated; may vary according to national policy)." What exactly does this mean? It means that regardless of the objective expiration date of a condom, some governments might destroy them prematurely, others might just hang on to them for a while. And how do they do this? By subjectively ascribing their own expiration dates, regardless of when they go bad.

So, who would take the gamble? Which one of you would don the condom that has been sitting in a sea container under the blistering African sun for six months? Then, why are we insisting that others do so? Why are we telling them that prophylactics are the solution to their problems? The world sends billions and billions of dollars in condoms to Africa. Why?

Imagine Africa is amalgamated into a single person. What can we hear them saying to us, what can we hear them begging for? "My children are dying of disease because we have no clean water. They are starving to death because we have no food. My family is being murdered and my wife and children are being raped and abducted, because there is no one to protect us. My children have no future, because they have no education. I have AIDS. I am poor. I have no economy."

How shall we answer them?" Your children are starving to death? Here's a condom. Your people are dying of diseases like malaria, dysentery, the buruli ulcer and Ebola? Here's a condom. Your people need clean water? Here's a condom. Your country is torn apart with tribal warfare? Here's a prophylactic. Your kids need an education? Here's a condom. You have AIDS? Here's a condom. You need help building a viable economy? Here, put this on your penis... it's magic."

Instead, of giving Africa what it needs, we give it condoms. We give them condoms that we wouldn't even be allowed to sell in the United States and tell them like a mantra," Use these and you won't get sick and you won't have any kids." Europe and America pander to this magical thinking because they think everyone in Africa is an animal and an idiot, that they don't have the capacity for abstract thoughts, for self control, for understanding what is good for them and what is not. "Just put this on and all your problems will go away." When what they are really saying is," Put this on and all of OUR problems will go away. We do not want to fix you! We do not want you to reproduce! We want you to go away! We want you to die! What don't you get about that?!"

Abstinence programs in Africa are often attacked on principle by many people. They start with all kinds of absurd arguments and try to dismiss it because Bush was for it, etc... However, if it was so ineffective, they'd be certain to prove it with statistical supports. Yet, if anyone hasn't noticed, there aren't any such arguments out there. In fact, the deepest arguments out there against abstinence programs are fallacious, by that I mean that they're bifurcations. "Because of this that... if you don't have this... if you don't do this... if you don't believe this... then this will happen." The statistical arguments against abstinence programs that do exist are taken from the early stages of the programs and are not comprehensive, they aren't followed up either.

The whole argument against abstinence is based solely on the idea that African's can't control themselves. That doesn't sound familiar does it? We need only go back sixty years to hear similar things about African Americans. These kinds of arguments against aggressive abstinence programs are bigoted without meaning to be, but they are bigoted and are constituted by errors of logic. It's a patently unscientific approach to the issue and as Plato was fond of saying," True opinion is knowledge." We all want to have the right opinion. There is a solution out there that is better for Africa, what you might call the right opinion. There is a way that is objectively better than the others.

When the US began their support of abstinence programs in Africa people were infuriated. The condom companies and far left analysts in Europe and American were watching the whole thing like a hawk. As soon as they could comment they did and they tried to railroad the programs into the ground. But as with all programs they take time to take effect. If you search through articles about abstinence programs in Africa, you'll see nothing but sharp, biased, leftist criticism up until about 2007. But it sharply tappers off in 2008 onward and you don't hear anything else about the matter in the way of criticism. Why? Because it works. In the countries that have employed the abstinence programs, they've been able to halt and in some cases reverse the spread of AIDS in their own countries. That's a feat that contraceptive programs can't compete with. I'll also add that condoms were still available to those populations during abstinence programs, but did not constitute the primary focus of the initiative.

If we were to divert the billions of dollars we have been using for condoms toward dams, agriculture, stronger industry relations with modernized nations, and education I think that we could help make an Africa that is capable of helping itself, an Africa with a future. But when I look at Africa and how we "deal" with the "problem" by putting a condom on it, I'm angered at the West. I see the same structuralism that caused the Irish Potato famine, that sick ideology that says some people must be starving, sick and dying for society to have any structure. It's almost seems like the world keeps saying to Africa," Take one for the team!" I say we stop throwing condoms at Africa and find a real solution.

"Every art and every inquiry, and similarly every action and choice, is thought to aim at some good; and for this reason the good has rightly been declared to be that at which all things aim." ~Aristotle~